Becky Says...

May 2005

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An Unfinished Trio - May 16

One is a piece of music, one is a piece of crochet, and one is a piece of writing. And I know me well enough to know why they are unfinished. In each case, there is some grief.

The piece of music is a flute descant I have about half done. It's on an American folk hymn, one that was sung at my friend D.'s funeral. D. had picked the hymns for the service; four hymns he loved.

I was part of D.'s life when he came to love American folk hymns, so I wasn't at all surprised when this one, which I also like, showed up on his list. During the hymn, I was filled with the idea that D. would particularly like me to write a flute descant for that one.

D. and I had done flute and organ work several times over the years we knew each other. Some of those times had included flute descants I had written. So if D. wanted another flute descant, well, I was happy to promise him I'd do it.

But I've stalled on finishing it. The reason? It feels like once I finish that one, I will have to finally say goodbye to D. I know that the man has been dead nearly ten years and the major goodbye has been said. But it will end a chapter in my life.

Next on my list is a gift I've been crocheting for a while. I have several reasons that one isn't finished, including some yarn troubles, and needing to devote needle time to other projects (for fun and profit).

But the major one is a change in a friendship, a change I don't particularly like. So it feels awkward to be working on the gift. I'll eventually finish it, for my own soul's sake.

The unfinished writing piece is the easiest to explain, and will probably be the easiest to finish. It's a piece I'm doing for the pleasure of the doing, in a genre in which I don't usually work. It has some sadness, and I have not quite decided what to do with that. Once I make that decision, the piece will move along.

Funny what grief will interrupt.

Text © copyright 2000-2005 Becky