October 2003

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The first of the rainy cold days is here. And it makes me sad. Not depressed, just sad. I have never found rainy days to be particularly appealing. I know a lot of people do, and in some ways I find myself envying those people, wishing I could find the romance in the raindrops and the gray skies. But I can't.

Rainy days mean I don't sleep well. They mean I usually hurt. Add cold weather to that, and the hurting is almost guaranteed.

In an effort to deal with something other than rain tonight, I've been reading. I've gone back through some things I haven't read in a while, and once again been captivated by them. I was reading the work of a writer who I've come to know as a friend in the time between first reading and tonight's rereads.

It's interesting to me how much that change in relationship has changed my perception of what was written. The words on the pages are the same, yet they're very much richer now. I came away from the reading session deeply moved.

So much so that writing this has been both quite easy and quite difficult.