August 2002

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The Hunger Site

Communication
Write to me

Okay folks, I've hit really hard times in Beckyland. I have about four days to come up with 700 dollars more than I have. This is an unexpected thing. I am using all my non-working energy trying to come up with ways to make this happen. And I'm sick to death of worrying about money. Yes, I know it's only money, but in this case it's also pride and not losing a reputation I've worked hard to keep, and frustration over having nothing I've tried come out right.

No, I'm not hinting for gifts of money. I will, however, say very nice things about the first ten people who order afghans (one of the most expensive things I make) in the shell stitch pattern and send the money immediately. I can, at this point, promise to make this many of the shell-stitch ones by Christmas. I can't promise fast delivery on the snowflake ones; they take much longer to make. And all orders are first-come, first served.

I understand that not everyone wants afghans, or baby blankets, or anything else I make. If you really can't use or afford something, could you send good thoughts, please?

And before you suggest I sell possessions...good advice, and I'm trying already. I have tried. I am planning to try a bit more. But the timing on this thing is getting tight. I didn't find out about the bill and its payment deadline until Monday. Arranging to sell things is not that easy. I have been working on that. If I can't come up with the funds by the first of next week, I will get in touch with the creditor to try to make other arrangements. This will wind up costing me even more money, and perhaps things dearer than that.

But I'm about to lose all hope of things working out right. I haven't been this depressed in a very long time, and I'm not kidding when I say I am desperate about this. You think I'd be telling virtual strangers about it otherwise? I am not, however, threatening suicide. Don't even wonder about that.

Money has been extremely tight for me since during my mother's illness. I managed to make ends meet fairly well till late last summer, and that's why the timing of the law firm job's coming open was such a miracle to me. Yes, I'm making very good money at the law firm. I'd be in good shape if this bill had not come when it did. Please don't ask for details of the bill; it is personal and it is valid.

But its timing is dreadfully bad.