Becky Says...

January 2002

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January 15

Happy second journal anniversary to Doug! Many of us can learn a lot from Doug's approach to life.

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After reading this, I wrote to Sister Betty this morning, on my way out the door. In that note, I included the notion that tears are the lube that helps one get through the world. And I really do think that.

I've been thinking all day about what I said. I've thought about the times that I've felt better after a good, long cry, and about the times other people have cried in my presence.

So what should you do if someone bursts into tears in front of you? I usually hand over the tissues and offer a shoulder. Sometimes, I wind up crying along. But I do my absolute best never to say anyone should stop crying. Because I think tears are how we wash our minds, and rid ourselves of all sorts of things that we need to be rid of.

Tears can wash away the haze of pain that keeps us from seeing clearly. They can help us refocus on what really is important in a given situation.

Of course, I'm not suggesting you use tears to get your way. That's cheap, and doesn't usually work. But if you have an honest need to cry --- and you know whether or not that's the case --- then cry.

Whoever you are, you have every right to cry.

And if anyone wants to argue with you about that, well, just send them to me.

Text copyright 2000-2002 Becky