Becky Says...

January 2002

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January 3

Dear Mother Nature:

Now listen up. I know you like the white stuff ("snow") covering all that grass and those bushes sometimes. But you need to work on the delivery systerm. You keep getting it all over the roads. Then you get all frustrated that your snowdrifts don't look just right, so you sigh. And your cold breath makes the stuff on the roads freeze. That makes a real mess down here. That means we have to just leave our cars, which are also covered with snow and ice.

My car

Across the parking lot

You need to work it out so that you sigh in such a way that all you do is blow the falling snow over to the ski slopes, so the people who want to have fun there can enjoy it. This road-freezing needs to stop.

And what is it with you and January in the even-numbered years? Are the after-holiday sales not good enough for you those years? Have you had too much company and just want to vent? Whatever it is, the snowing-and-sighing routine seems to go into high gear, and it's causing us down here to miss being able to do the things we need to do.

For instance, we have this habit called "surviving," which involves having food. Most of us these days have other jobs, and live in such a way that we don't grow our own. We have to go buy it at places called "grocery stores" or "supermarkets" (see here for more information on them). And when you do the snow-sigh thing, you force us to go there ahead of the predicted arrival time of your snow and stock up on stuff we might not buy otherwise, at least not in such mass quantities. We do this because we know you'll prevent us from doing it for a while. And then we have to do it again---the mass quantities thing---when you stop sighing long enough to let some melting happen.

And in order to get the food from these stores, we have to have something called "money." People give that to us in exchange for something called "work," which many of us do not do in our own homes. And when you make it so icy we can't get to work, you cost us money and make it harder for us to get food.

I'm sure you had not thought of these things before. But now that I have brought it to your attention, I expect you to make an effort to improve the delivery system of your white goods, as suggested above. All attempts will be appreciated.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.


Text copyright 2000-2002 Becky