Becky Says...

October 23, 2001

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Satanic Darts

Dear Jerry,

I understand your boy is asking the faithful to send you some money. Seems to feel you need help getting rid of the Satanic Darts.

I hear he wants the good people who read his plea to send you fifty or a hundred bucks, to tell you how right they think you are. I'm hoping that any who can afford such expenditures will use their cash for something more worthwhile than buying your favor. Who knows. Maybe the people who get this latest begging letter will see the idiocy it contains, and not feel guilty for not doing as they're invoked to do.

Oh---since it was your kid involved, you might want to make sure you don't deny knowing the source of the Satanic Darts comment. That may have worked in the Teletubbie character instance, but not this time.

Of course, I won't send you any money. Wouldn't if I had money to burn, because I think you and your version of Christianity are wrong. In fact, if I had some cash to spare, I'd set up the Rest of the World Club. I would invite my friends to join. You know all of us. We're the liberals, the feminists, the civil libertarians, the gays, and all the other people who don't think we'll going to hell just because you say we will.

Oh, for the comedy of it, I loved the notion of Satanic Darts. Apparently you'd have us believe that if the slings and arrows of cruel fate don't get you, those darts will do it every time!

As ever,


Text © copyright 2000-2001 Becky