March 30, 2001
The people I love most in the world are those who are affirming. Those who hand out "attagirls." Those who remind me that things will get better, that I'm doing a decent job living my life, and say other affirming things.
Not that I feel a constant need for affirmation, just that I deeply appreciate it when it comes.
I love it when people are encouraging, no matter the subject. I had occasion recently to tell a friend, via e-mail, about a new project I'm starting. In his reply, he not only wished me well, he thought of a couple of reasons why the project will probably go well that I hadn't thought about. That was a very affirming thing to me.
Another couple of friends handed out "attagirls" two years ago when I was deciding to do freelance work full-time. Their moral support came at a time when I wasn't sure if I was making the right decision, but thought it was worth exploring for a few months at least. And it was affirming to hear they thought I would do just fine.
I know how wonderful it can be when someone affirms me, and how soul-shattering it can be when someone naysays. I haven't yet learned how not to listen to the naysayers, but I have developed over the years the spirit of wanting to show them I'm right.
There's a difference, of course, between someone helping you see the big picture and making sure you're aware of the choices and consequences, and someone just flatly telling you your goals are impossible. It is the latter group that I want to prove wrong.
And with the right mix of work, talent, luck, and affirmation, I can do just that.
I promised an update on Donna's mother when I had one: she did have surgery on Thursday, and is home from the hospital and doing very well.