January 2003

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It's been a crazy week at the law firm, and it's only Tuesday. The craziness is largely because TC the admin type has been out sick, and Wendy and I have been being TC plus ourselves for two days. Poor office dog Zoe is really confused. She can't understand why her people are sitting at the wrong desks, etc, at least part of the time (Zoe has rules, you know).

But I had a treat in the midst of the craziness today. A businessman I have known ever since my days at Non-Profit Agency #1 returned a call from our Associate Attorney 1. She was finishing up something and needed another small amount of time before she could take the call, so my friend and I had a good catch-up session.

On another pleasant note, tech support will be sending a new touchpad mouse to see if that will solve the keyboard/mouse troubles. Although it has been frustrating to have the problems arise, I appreciate the way Dell's tech support troubleshoots...they seem to trust that their customers can follow instructions and answer questions. And I'm learning all sorts of things about that laptop.

January 28

As I write, it's very early morning. I am running diagnostics on the Dell laptop, trying to solve the keyboard/mouse issue I mentioned last week. I've been in touch with tech support and I'm running this session of diagnostics after doing a couple of troubleshooting things that tech asked me to do, but that haven't solved the problem. I'm working on a different computer, and the world is quiet.

The night is cold. There is still some snow outside (and there was a gracious plenty at the office on Monday), and I heard that the temperature would be in the low teens before dawn. I can believe it.

Not that you'd know it, but I've paused for a bit to write to tech support; the diagnostics were inconclusive. I made sure I listed everything I did, of course, so that took some time. And I've shut that computer down.

I think next on the agenda is sleep. It's past even my bedtime.

January 26

I was reading something this past week that mentioned a book having been, "first published in the mid-Twentieth Century." The phrase struck me funny, because that sounds like some moment in pre-history, with the date having been scrawled on that era's version of the Rosetta Stone.

And it reminds me of my feelings about being somewhat prehistoric, since I made my own appearance in the middle years of said century.

Amusing remarks aside, if you're going to make judgments about me, please do so on some basis other than my calendar age. Especially do not tag me as being middle-aged. I am not what I think of as middle-aged. For one thing, I doubt I'll live to twice my present age, so on that basis, I passed middle age a while back.

Mainly, I don't feel anything like settled. Middle-aged is supposed to feel settled. You're supposed to know what you want to do when you grow up by now, if you're not actually doing it. I'm just barely reaching that point. If I get all the way to the settled version of middle age, you'll be among the first to know.

And it annoys the hell out of me when one or two of my friends and several of my cousins assume I'm menopausal. For the record, I'm not. When I am, I'll own up to it, if need be. This most often comes up if I get hot, by the way. I'm a hot-natured person, and that has always been the case. Either that or I've been menopausal and having hot flashes since I was a toddler (as far back as I can remember).

Nor is the hair gray. That doesn't sit well with the cousins, I think, but too bad. It is not my genetic fault that they went gray early. I do have a few gray hairs, but few is the word---there aren't ten of them. And for the record, I don't want gray hair, and will dye it when the time comes.

Something else I'm not is nearly as conservative (in terms of outlook, not specifically politics) as I think middle-aged is. I'm downright reckless compared to most of the people I know---some far younger than I, by the way---who really do act middle-aged. And I don't plan to change my non-conservative ways. Ever, if possible.