As we head into the holiday charity time of year, I thought I'd present the following as a public service announcement. I suspect I'm not the only one who feels this way about being presented with requests for money or time.

If you want a donation from me, don't bother trying to make me feel guilty. It won't get you anything except my contempt. Instead, tell me why your group needs my help, and don't get upset if I want more information before pulling out my checkbook.

And if you want cooperation from me in some project, don't bother trying to make me feel guilty. I will resent your attempt, and will balk at helping.

I am much more likely to be motivated to give money (when I have it) or time to something I believe in, presented quietly and without attempt to tell me that I'm bad if I don't give/do whatever.

Oh, and while I'm at it...suggested amounts are a joke, right? I mean the ones where you're led to check a box beside a dollar amount. I actually like to see the ones where you tell me how much good any one dollar can do for the cause. But telling me how much to give? Forget it. Especially if you've personalized the requested amount (most often done by local agencies) based on what you think my income is.

And it helps your cause a whole lot if you remember to say thank you.